Heartbreak Motel


There's nothing quite like a good old breakup post so here I fucking go.

A teenage breakup is just one of the things that everyone goes through. I'm not here to reflect on my experiences but more give advice and hope that others know that they are not alone.

A breakup is heart-wrenching and especially for those that have never experienced one its a surge of emotions that no one prepares you for. You're simultaneously angry, sad, confused, and sometimes but not always relieved. Relationships are like drugs, your brain surges with dopamine and oxytocin when you see them, you become reliant on this surge of lovely chemicals and when you're not with them your brain craves them, hence why it hurts when you're not with them even in the relationship. But when they're gone your brain starts acting confused by craving these chemicals but simultaneously knowing that you are never going to have them again from this person. So you start withdrawing from them and desiring to have them back.

However, one of the things that someone told me a while ago that really resonated with me is that a breakup is called a breakup because it was broken. It's very easy to resonate and relish the good times and memories that you had with this person and create a fantasy bubble in which you happily live out the good parts but not realising the reasons that you broke up. Your heart and brain conflict as you know that you weren't right together but also miss so many things. But every time you feel yourself slipping off and reminiscing on the good times try and inter-relate it to the reasons why you broke up.

One of the toughest things about a breakup is not having the person there in which you confided all of your emotions and secrets and felt like was truly yours, that person that you felt you knew best and vice versa. The best way to get over this and move on to this is to start confiding in your friendships and letting these emotions wash over you, don't bury them or else they just build up and burst out later. Accepting and understanding your emotions is one of the most important aspects of maturity. Allowing yourself to feel certain ways and not trying to hide them or dismiss them allows you to mentally and physically move on and process what is happening. In this example with a breakup letting yourself feel how you need to feel and understand that sometimes in these scenarios you have to be a little selfish and self-reflective in order to help yourself and others in the future is the only thing you can do. Breakups are tough and breakups are difficult but at this point in time, everyone will or has been through one or two so don't feel alone. Anyways peace and love, don't worry no one is alone.

Yours lovingly,

Jamie